Momma knows...

Uh, I absolutely hate being sick. I feel useless, just laying in bed, sleeping most of the day away. I have so much that needs to be done and so much that I should be doing, instead of lounging in my bed trying to down as much warm tea I possibly can, in order to get my voice back.

I've had a lot of time to think though.  A lot of time to think about my life and what I'm doing with it. Is my life being led by selfishness or am I living my life for God. It's times like these when I can turn back and analyze all the things I've done or said or thought. My long term life goals are still the same. I still plan on getting my EMT basic, finding a job, and eventually using it for His work. However, if I'm suppose to be doing it ultimately for Him, then why is it so easy to slack off in that class when I know I should be putting every effort of my being into it? I have so much work that I need to do for that class, so much to catch up on. I haven't put in the real effort into that class that it deserves but yet I tried so hard, and so long to get into the program. Why is it, that I've taken yet another opportunity for granted?

I've been asking myself those questions since the first week of class, when I noticed that my attention in that class drifted. I had nothing distracting me from that one goal. I knew what I wanted and I knew how to get it. Why then is it hard for me to concentrate on a subject that I'm usually pulled into concentrating on.

Here comes the end to all of it. Today I will catch up in this class.

• I will not fall into procrastination. 
• I will not put socialization in front of my goal. 
• I will not slack off. 

If this is truly the path that God has chosen for me, I will work towards it eagerly and with wholeheartedness. 

Father, I pray that you give me the ability to not lose focus. I pray that You inspire me to continue on with the class and give it all I can till it's over  (one month). I pray that You use me for Your will. Keep my eyes on You Father. - Amen.